These words are like razors. Ears bleeding and I am wrecked. "It never would have worked". These are the words of our new doctor in Florida. The treatment plan we were following for my husbands diabetic ulcer here in Chicago was a complete waste of time.
For two years we gave up our marriage on the altar. We could not claim it for ourselves directing it the way we would want it to go. There was no freedom or flexibility. We were martyrs of our own making. Dying daily. Living but barely breathing. And still it never would have worked.
Oh these words! And there are more; too severe for another skin graft. His foot is worse than it ever was which is why we would do something so risky like separate for months. My worst fears are playing themselves out. There are more tests this week and more appointments next week and so beginning any surgical process is weeks ago.
The funny thing about weeks is that they add up. And the math is not in my favor. I feared we would be apart for three months or more and now I am beginning to see that I am probably right. By the time he returns it will be 60 and sunny in Chicago. This is a day I am longing for. Springtime for the soul could not come fast enough.
For two years we gave up our marriage on the altar. We could not claim it for ourselves directing it the way we would want it to go. There was no freedom or flexibility. We were martyrs of our own making. Dying daily. Living but barely breathing. And still it never would have worked.
Oh these words! And there are more; too severe for another skin graft. His foot is worse than it ever was which is why we would do something so risky like separate for months. My worst fears are playing themselves out. There are more tests this week and more appointments next week and so beginning any surgical process is weeks ago.
The funny thing about weeks is that they add up. And the math is not in my favor. I feared we would be apart for three months or more and now I am beginning to see that I am probably right. By the time he returns it will be 60 and sunny in Chicago. This is a day I am longing for. Springtime for the soul could not come fast enough.